TWENTY NINTH INSTALMENT



Jay was not there when I got back. It was lucky for me. When he did get home he just looked at me. Jay never usually made a fuss or did anything when his parents and sister were home. He took himself off to be he was so smashed he couldn't have spoken if he wanted too. By the time I went to bed he was snoring.

The next morning I woke really early. I hadn't slept very well. I remember being sore from the day before and my back was killing me from sleeping on that stupid mattress/bed on the floor.  I walked out to the kitchen and I had forgotten about my face from the day before. When I walked out Jay's sister was sitting at the table. "Emily! What happened to your face" she asked obviously she knew what had happened or at least could tell from my face. "oh I ran in to the door again, I'm so clumsy now that I'm pregnant". You could see from the look on her face she didn't believe me and before I saw her mum and dad I ran to the bathroom and put on make up.

Going into that room gave me shivers. I actually started to shake. 

To this day I don't like bathing with anyone. I don't even like people being in the bathroom when I am going to have a bath or shower, this makes it hard for my husband and he doesn't quiet understand why. That day has left a scar that I still struggle with.

I can swim in a pool but I don't like my face going near the water in the bath and in the shower I fill my hands with water and splash my face before and after washing it.

I digress.

I put on my make up and took myself out to get some breakfast. Jay came out not long after. "Were going out today, going to see Steven" he stated. He never mentioned the day before. He acted like nothing happened. We went and saw Steven for a little while so he could have a smoke. When he had had enough we went back home. He sat on the lounge and I went and got all our dirty clothes to wash them.

When the washing had finished I got the basket and put all the wet clothes in. The basket was pretty heavy as we had heaps we had to wash. It really was a struggle for me with my tummy so big to pick up the basket and carried it in front of me. If anyone had seen me they firstly would have tried to help but they would have had a giggle at a fat pregnant girl skinny legs and arms trying to carry this. 

Jay must have heard me getting the clothes out. I had to walk downstairs to hang out the clothes. When you walk down the stairs you walked straight in to the garage then there was a door under the stairs that led outside to the clothes line. I heard 

Jay walking through the house. As I took the first stair I felt a shove in my back and I tumbled down the stairs. If anyone has fallen down stairs you know that you try to stop yourself falling but when you are this pregnant and trying to carry a basket  you have no hope. I ended up sprawled out at the bottom face first.

I looked up and saw Jay staring at me from the top of the stairs. He didn't say a work. I was crying and trying to get up. I finally pulled myself up and tried to pull myself together. I looked up again and Jay had gone. I walked out and hung the clothes on the line. I had skin off my knees, elbow, hands and a lump on my head that appear pretty much straight away. 

I hung the clothes out with tears streaming down my cheeks and I was definitely feeling sorry for myself. I was trying to understand what I had done wrong. There was no use. I finished hanging out the clothes and walked back in. I put the clothes basket down on the ground just inside the door. I stood there for a moment breathed in a few times and got the courage up to walk upstairs (all I really wanted to do was run far away as far as I could get). 

As I climbed the stairs I could hear the tv going but couldn't hear Jay. I walked past that dreadful bathroom past the bedroom around the hallway and in to the lounge room... Jay wasn't there! Where was he? Just as this thought had come to my mind I felt him grabbing me from behind. He covered my mouth and just stared at me with pure evil in his eyes. " what the fuck did you tell Trisha?". I couldn't speak and he really didn't want to hear me speak, he spun me around and pushed my onto the familiar floor and again sat on me as he had done the day before. My arms were so bruised from the day before that ever touching them lightly hurt.

He was screaming at me and he hit me in the face a few more times. Then he put his hands around my necks and pushed down while at the same time squeezing. I could hardly breathe and every time I tried to scream nothing was coming out and it felt like my throat was on fire. 

I heard the front door open. I couldn't move. Jay didn't release my throat. I don't think he really heard it or he didn't care more to the point. Jay's sister walked in and screamed at Jay but that mad him even more angry. I remember seeing her face then I remember the door slamming. At this stage I thought I was dead. I stopped struggling and then everything went black.

The next thing I remember is opening my eyes and seeing Jay's dad holding him up against a walk screaming at his and Jay's sister looking at me. She saw me open my eyes and said "dad she's alive". He released Jay as he did this Jay ran out of the house. Jay's sister helped me up and sat me on the lounge. I don't remember much of anything else. I don't remember Jay's dad talking to me. I got up to go to our room and as I got close I sensed Jay's sister behind me. She helped me lay down. "Emily you have to get out before he kills you" I will remember those words till I leave this earth. I just laid on the bed and fell asleep felling safe that Jay's father and sister were in the house.

If Jay's sister had not arrived that day I probably would not be writing this. Just to give you an idea of how log I was out. Jay's father worked on the other side of town at least 40 km away. Jay's sister had to ride her bike and it is not a flat ride as you could probably imagine. When I woke up if felt like seconds but it must have been about an hour on her bike. 

Jay didn't come home that night, he was smart why would he come home when is dad was furious. He did return the next morning though and what happened then was terrible.....

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